Brood Letter 14 | A Lineage of Loss & Love

by Brood

Content Warning: This post contains discussions of stillbirth and early infant loss. Due to its heavy nature and content we suggest you take breaks when necessary, and check in with yourself. We also encourage you to have a support person accessible to you — whether learning alongside you, in the next room, or a phone call away.

Life has a curious way of intertwining our stories with those who came before us connecting our experiences across generations in unexpected and profound ways. For me, part of this connection was forged through a shared journey of grief and loss that spans the generations of the women in my family. It’s not new news that the experiences of our parents deeply affect who we are and who we becomeit can be felt generation to generation, and is so often unspoken. We all grieve, heal and move through loss differently, and through my own experiences with miscarriage I’ve been able to connect more deeply with my own mother, Daphne.

My lineage and ancestors are no strangers to pregnancy loss and the grief associated with it. Between my grandmother, mother, aunt, and myself we hold the wisdom and grief of 7 miscarriages, and 1 stillbirth. Three generations of loss that I hold in my DNA, in my bones and my heart. I’m lucky to know these stories and to be a part of a family where sharing is supported, and expected. I haven’t been the best at gathering oral histories, and wanted to ask my mom more about her loss, because to me it’s the beginning of my story too. Without it, I wouldn’t be here at all.

Talking about hard things is, well, hard. It sucks actually. My therapist recently said to me, “We don’t WANT to work on things, why would we? It doesn’t feel good and it’s difficult! But we need to.” My Brood knows that sharing these stories helps others heal. It eventually has the power to change BIG things like how we move through the world holding it and even what kind of care we can access. And it starts with a story. 

If you’re currently experiencing loss, or have in the past, we have our Miscarriage & Early Loss course for FREE all of October! Please share it far and wide—we want as many people as possible to access this knowledge and care. Have your own story to share? Reach out to us, we’d love to hear from you. 

Holding you tight this month, and always.

Gill & the Brood Care team

 

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We work and live on the unceded and occupied territories of the Sḵwx̱wú7mesh Úxwumixw (Squamish), səl̓ilw̓ətaʔɬ (Tsleil-Waututh) and xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam) Nations. Since time immemorial, the original peoples of these lands have cared for their families and communities. We are committed to honouring their teachings, legacy and their sovereignty.

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